Maybe There Has Been a Reversal of Position by the Major Parties
The following passage was originally about Republicans but it's now about Democrats (it starts out talking about Obama and ends up talking about Clinton):
"But a rayformer don't see it. A rayformer thinks he was ilicted because he was a rayformer, whin th' thruth iv th' matther is he was ilicted because no wan knew him. Ye can always ilict a man in this counthry on that platform. If I was runnin' f'r office, I'd change me name, an' have printed on me cards: 'Give him a chanst; he can't be worse.' He's ilicted because th' people don't know him an' do know th' other la-ad; because Mrs. Casey's oldest boy was clubbed be a polisman, because we cudden't get wather above th' third story wan day, because th' sthreet car didn't stop f'r us, because th' Flannigans bought a pianny, because we was near run over be a mail wagon, because th' saloons are open Sundah night, because they're not open all day, an' because we're tired seein' th' same face at th' window whin we go down to pay th' wather taxes. Th' rayformer don't know this. He thinks you an' me, Hinnissy, has been watchin' his spotless career f'r twinty years, that we've read all he had to say on th' evils iv pop'lar sufferage befure th' Society f'r the Bewildermint iv th' Poor, an' that we're achin' in ivry joint to have him dhrag us be th' hair iv th' head fr'm th' flowin' bowl an' th' short card game, make good citizens iv us an' sind us to th' pinitinchry. So th' minyit he gets into th' job he begins a furyous attimpt to convart us into what we've been thryin' not to be iver since we come into th' wurruld.In case you need the above translated into English:
"But a reformer don't see it. A reformer thinks he was elected because he was a reformer, when the truth of the matter is he was elected because no one knew him. You can always elect a man in this country on that platform. If I was running for office, I'd change my name, and have printed on my cards: 'Give him a chance; he can't be worse.' He's elected because the people don't know him and do know the other lad; because Mrs. Casey's oldest boy was clubbed by a policeman, because we couldn't get water above the third story one day, because the street car didn't stop for us, because the Flannigans bought a piano, because we was near run over by a mail wagon, because the saloons are open Sunday night, because they're not open all day, and because we're tired seeing the same face at the window when we go down to pay the water taxes. The reformer don't know this. He thinks you and me, Hennessy, has been watching his spotless career for twenty years, that we've read all he had to say on the evils of popular suffrage before the Society for the Bewilderment of the Poor, and that we're aching in every joint to have him drag us by the hair of the head from the flowing bowl and the short card game, make good citizens of us and send us to the penitentiary. So the minute he gets into the job he begins a furious attempt to convert us into what we've been trying not to be ever since we come into the world.